Blog 01/05/2014

It's officially May. That means, my birthday is coming in 17 days, which kind of devastates me. I'm turning 13 this year. It's actually terrible how your status changes from a "kid" to a "teenager". It just seems as if I aged a lot within one day. I won't be able to accept the fact that I have become a teenager.

I have many childish interests. That is not because I pretend to be a kid, but because of the fact that I really am not mentally-mature. I bought a squeaking duck toy last month, which is surprising because I never played with toys as a kid. Year by year, I have grown more youthful mentally.

As a kid, I wished that my 13th birthday would come quicker. I wanted to have the rights that teenagers had. I never liked any sort of doll, or toy, or even chasing games. I was the girl who would chat with the adults and act maturely. But now, I really hope that time stops before my birthday, so I can stay as a kid.

What I love about being a kid is that they are free-spirited. They don't consider too much, and are filled with joy because they don't see the sad things of life that adults see. Also, life is less stressful, and often they just do things according to their desire, which I can't afford to anymore. Even though I do have to admit that I have become more energetic over the years, usually kids are more energetic. When I stand and watch the youngsters frolick around, that's when I realize the sad fact -- I am old.

It's nearly the end of this academic year, which means that I will no longer be one of the "youngest members of the school community". As form ones, we are considered as energetic babies, which is what I want. Once we go to form two, we will become "older sisters". It really makes me feel old.

I know it's the sad reality that I am going to turn 13, but I can still remain childlike mentally. I shall continue aiming to be free-spirited, and do everything with a young heart (laughs). I wonder if I can accept myself as an old lady when I turn 65...